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Things were starting to get a bit blurry, the lines between real and my vivid dreams were seriously starting to mess with me. I don’t dream often, or at least not that I remember, the exception being my erotic dreams – always a treat when an orgasm wakes me up. Though, never in these dreams are my lovers anyone I’ve ever recognized, just happy little ephemeral sprites dropping in for some fun – that is, until recently.
I’ve never been one for breezy crushes. Truth be told, I’m a bit of a misanthrope, so it takes a lot to get my pulse racing. Something needs to catch my deeper interest. & right now, I feel caught. The first time it happened I woke up groggy and freaked out. Like I said, I never, ever recognize anyone in my dreams. My immediate reactions was – too close for comfort, I need some distance to (literally) get him out of my head. Easier said than done.
He’d always been in my peripheral. I’d been listening to his music for years but didn’t know him well. For me it’s too weird to get to know people whose art proceeds them, especially if their work means something to me. I don’t like to confuse art with life – or chance ruining the art I love. He circled in and out of our mutual friend gatherings and I always let there be space between us, up until about a half a year ago, after he moved in with my best friend Lucy and her brother. It became harder to be aloof without it being insulting or confirming the extremes of my social awkwardness. Soon though, in casual clipped conversations between him coming and going he asked why I’d never seen him play. My excuses were valid(ish), ships in the night, I’d never been in town at the same time his band happened to have a show, other commitments, and such.
About a month after that I got a text from him.
– Lucy gave me your number. Tour date set for end of month at Bowery. You’re guest list, in case you want to come. –
I always get a fluttering in my stomach before a show. Music is something I’ll always be viscerally excited about, but this time it bordered on anxious nausea. Good thing my friends and a few drinks were waiting to mellow my mood, though I think this was the moment when things blurred. Seeing an artist in their element will never not be a supreme turn on. Maybe this is why I avoided seeing him play. It only made me want to be away from him even more, because it drew me in in a way that was beyond my controlling it and I was not ready for those feels. The next night is when he showed up in my devilishly sexy nighttime visions. My deja vu soon started ramping up any time I was near him, I knew something would happen – most likely I’d embarrass myself somehow – if I didn’t make myself scarce.
“Heard this one yet?”
I crank up the volume and my head starts to buzz. Lucy nods to the bass line and gives me a massive smile and a thumbs up at the breakdown. We’re sitting in the rigged together soundproofed room a bunch of us pitched in on so we can jam without the neighbors plotting eviction-worthy complaints. Apparently it’s not quite living up to its task and needs some fine tuning as Jude pops his head in –
“Ladies. It’s loud.”
– is what I think he says, but the music is, in fact, so loud I can just see his lips silently move as he shoots us both a raised eyebrow in mock scolding. It makes my insides quake. Lucy shoo’s him away with her hand but he just shakes his head ‘no,’ so I kill it.
“Pretty sure I could feel the floor shaking. Otherwise we just had an earthquake.”
“I vote the second.”
“If only, because then the text I got from Sara downstairs could be argued with.”
“Fuck her,” Lucy breaks in.
“To be fair, you’ve been trying. Maybe we should line the floor with mattresses, it’ll serve duel purposes if you can get her up here to seduce her with the idea the music is her friend while showing our solution.”
Lucy smiles and announces she’ll go smooth it over. Jude salutes her on her way out. My deja vu kicks in as he places his head to the edge of the door to look at me. Then I remember my very lucid dream. He’s sitting in the corner of the couch Lucy just hopped off of, and I’m naked. I feel a lump form in my throat and I get nervous. I get spectacularly weird when I get nervous.
“Share with the class.”
“What?” I’m snapped out of my dazed remembering.
“The new music, rude.” Jude swirls a tumbler in his hand and takes a gulp of whatever brown liquid tempted him this afternoon.
“Trade you.” I hold out my hand towards his glass.
Taking a deep drink, the warmth starts to subdue that electric energy that builds in me whenever he’s around. He drops himself onto the corner of the couch and I take another quick sip.
“Hey, I can get you your own,” he laughs, “but first,” he points at the speaker,” – a few thousand decibels lower. Sara used some choice language sarıyer escort in her text.”
“This band doesn’t really work at low volume.”
“Ok, what else you got?”
I smile and click on The Moon and Antarctica.
“Holy fuck it’s been foreverrrrrr -“
“Sacrilege! This should be on heavy rotation.” Another sip and I see he’s signaling for the glass back. I have to stand to bring it to him, but my feet know what my head knows and the nervousness surges again.
“Come hang,” he coaxes when I don’t immediately move.
Goddamnit. I hold out the glass and he grabs my arm and pulls me down next to him. God, damnit. He’s going to notice I can’t keep my chill around him anymore. Not after what he did to me in my dream. I feel a little shudder go through me at the thought, and a very specific aching need in a very specific spot.
“So tell me what’s been new with you, you haven’t come over in a bit.”
“Nothing much, Lucy was out of town on tour so -“
Caught off guard with his tone I turn to look him straight in the face. With how close we are, it feels inevitable, but I pause. He doesn’t.
The jolt that goes through me when our lips connect is followed by my muscles surrendering to melting into him. I feel myself start to ache more and panic intensely, I’m entirely too turned on, my dream is flashing across my mind, confusing things. I pull away.
“Lucy’s headed out of town again in a few days, figured I needed to let you know you should come by even if she’s not around.”
I can feel my pulse racing, deja vu is hitting me in waves as he looks at me waiting for my response. I take the glass from his hand, down it, and place it on the floor without saying a word. I feel his hand reach for my waist and pull me back in to him.
“I have to admit something.”
“Yeah? What’s that.” He doesn’t seem phased in the least that needing to admit something generally means things are going to get awkward or even bad. The sincere look in his eye doesn’t help with how gone on him I am.
“I’ve had these really weirdly strong feelings for you for a while, they’ve been fucking with me, and right now I’m so turned on I don’t really trust myself to be able to handle this situation without doing something that could come off as supremely slutty – from general society’s, and possibly your, perspective. Not mine. I make no apologies for… I should probably stop talking now. And head out.” I move to get up but he catches my wrist.
“For the record, I don’t believe in ‘slutty.’ That’s just some made up shaming bullshit, unless you’re using it as a kink, and a judgement I’ve learned to never pass. Second, I can’t stop thinking about you either. I’ve been careening between insanely inspired and fearing nothing I play sounds good enough when I think about you hearing it, and it’s been driving me mad.”
“Pretty convenient thoughts on sluttiness in this moment, wouldn’t you say?”
“Did you miss the part where I admitted you’re driving me out of my mind? And If you’re a hoe, I’m a hoe – don’t forget I’m here too.”
He leans in for another kiss and I taste the scotch on his tongue, the fire of his breath.
“Seems like we both have something we need to get out of our system.”
“That sounds like you just want to use me, for whatever purposes your dirty mind has conjured, and then send me on my way. You should know I’m not that kind of girl,” he cheekily offers.
“Well then, I actually should go because I do have some particular ideas – inspirations of my own, really – about what I’d like to do to you.” I give him a knowing look and something shifts.
His hands tighten around my waist before he pulls me astride his lap. The energy built up between us hits a breaking point and things get real heavy, real quick. It’s like everything slows down. A current of need pulses between us.
I tangle my hands in his hair and press my thighs down hard onto him as we kiss deeply. I can feel his firmness pressed against my leg through his pants. I know exactly what I’m going to do to him. Pulling my face away from his I bite down on my finger with insanely horny indecision. Jude pulls my hand away and pushes his own thumb into my mouth.
“Let me go down on you,” he offers. My insides spark and I tremble. I suck hard on his thumb and push his hand away.
“No, not yet. Me first.”
He cocks an eyebrow and I reach for his belt while sinking to my knees in front of him.
“Hands behind your head,” I direct.
He gives me a strange look but follows my instruction. Lifting his hips I slide his pants and underwear off and presented to me is his gorgeously thick dick. Pushing my hands up his chest I drag my fingers down his sides as I take him into my mouth. He swells even esenyurt escort more and throbs against my tongue as I swallow deep. I notice he curves up ever so slightly – I’ve always loved the added sensations of such a situation. Tilting his head back I hear him let out a low groan. I glance up to see his hands are gripping the couch behind his neck. I take my time licking and teasing the plush head of his cock, sucking firmly all the way down his shaft, taking in as much as I can of his hardness. Soon I feel a hand brush against my cheek.
“Mmm, mmm,” I tsk him. “Hands behind your head. Do I need to keep an eye on you?”
He moves his hands back to interlace behind his head and I keep eye contact as I slowly work my mouth up and down, taking my pleasure in running my lips over him without him being able to touch me, and swallowing hard as he hits the back of my throat. His face expresses that of intense satisfaction and disbelief, and it turns me on to cause that in him. I feel him trying to shift around from the intensity so I move my forearms to firmly hold his thighs in place, wanting to give him no reprieve from the sensations, no choice but to focus and breathe through the pleasure I’m offering. Once I finally incorporate my hands into my what my mouth has started I feel him start to buck his hips and tense, the perfect moment to stop. I stand up and he reaches for me.
“Wait, soon. Hands on yourself, sir.” I move his hands to his hard on.
While he starts stroking himself I turn around and lift my shirt over my head. Next I slide my jeans slowly over the curve of my hips, bending fully at the waist to take them off, giving him full view of, what I can feel, are my wet undies. Just as I’m about to stand up he grabs me and pulls me into him so I’m sitting on his lap facing away from him.
“Now, it’s my turn. Sit on my face you merciless tease,” he whispers into my ear, turning my jaw back towards him with a firm grip and crushing my mouth to his.
One knee on the armrest of the couch, my other thigh he’s holding to keep me pressed up against him, his tongue starts exploring the softness of my inner thighs, circling around what I want for what feels like ages. Payback is kind of a bitch. Soon though I feel him glide his tongue across the entire length of my slit, flicking the tip across my clit, and I nearly fall over. He has to tighten his grip to steady me. Pulsing his tongue over my pleasure center, I feel him slip a finger in and I answer by starting to grind into him, nearly begging for release. ‘Please’ whimpers out of my mouth more than once. I can feel my orgasm building and beg for it in earnest. Just then he quickly throws me onto my back on the couch and adds another finger to his effort, licking and sucking me over my edge. My orgasm crashes across me, hard. I can barely get a breath in. His palm rocks out every last throbbing ounce of my pleasure. I feel his breath first, and then his lips on my neck. Then I feel him gliding the head of his dick over my aching, soaked opening.
“Yes?” he asks, catching my eyes with his. I see in his gaze there’s a questioning need. I nod. “Are you sure?” He presses his lips onto my jaw.
“Yes, yes I’m sure, please, ohhh fuck.”
It’s unimaginable. Feeling his girth slide in just as my orgasm is subsiding slams me back into another rush of release. My body feels light and my movements like I’m underwater. Wrapping himself on top of me so closely and rolling his hips deeply is setting every nerve alight. My head is swimming, I’m dazed. He’s holding my face so his is pressed against mine, and all the sexy, short panting breaths coming from him – almost impossibly – turns me on even more. Soon, though, I feel his hand move from my jaw and wrap around my throat. My mind is alert again, I want him to squeeze ever so slightly tighter. I pull his hair and he gets the message.
“Fuck, yes, oh, please,” I beg as he starts slamming his hips into me a bit harder. Just hard enough. He starts whispering dirty things in my ear and I feel myself go weak all over. Gripping my throat, thrusting deeply into me, telling me how good his cock feels filling me as I tighten around him – my dream about him doesn’t hold a candle to the reality of this moment.
“I want you to ride me,” he directs, his lips once again finding mine. Our tongues gliding in rhythm with how he’s pushing into me is consuming me. I know exactly how I want to ride him.
He pulls me up to face him but I instead stand up and press him back into the corner of the couch. Turning my ass towards him, intending to sit on him, he quickly takes advantage of the position and pushes his face between my legs. My knees nearly buckle. The man is so fucking talented and alert to my desires. And he must have known exactly what I was going for because next avrupa yakası escort he grabs my waist and sinks me back onto his thick hard on. & oh my god, that slight curve of his, it’s hitting exactly the right way in this position. One hand again around my throat, the other helping me rock back and forth on his lap, I move his bottom hand to cover my mouth to keep me quiet – forgetting where we are for the moment. It feels so goddamn good I’m letting out uncontrollable, trembling moans and am close to getting loud. He dips the tips of his fingers into my mouth and then reaches down for my aching button while the hand that was on my throat takes over covering my mouth again. I can’t even deal, I feel my eyes flutter close, the feeling is so intense, my urgent moans muffled by his palm, and my orgasm rushing on again.
“I want you to cum on my cock so hard that you tense so much I can’t handle it,” he whispers into my ear, doubling his efforts of rocking my hips on top of his throbbing dick, giving a fresh little smack to my clit. My body answers in kind. It’s a good thing we’re in a soundproofed room because both of us moaning as I cum on him I’m certain would more than catch the neighbor’s complaining attention if they could hear any of it.
Before the waves of my orgasm subside Jude has me sitting back on the couch, legs spread wide as he continues to thrust and grind into me. Keeping our languid gazes locked on one another he’s still whispering to me those sweet dirty nothings and I never want this to end. Things are blurry, I’m drowning deeply in the sensations.
Soon I see the look in his eye turn a bit more focused and I know he’s feeling the building of his own release.
“Beg me,” I tell him.
“Please Cara, please let me cum, let me cum inside you.”
“How bad do you want to? I want to hear you say it.”
I feel him miss a beat and I think he’s lost it but he pulls himself together.
“I want it in the worst way, I’ve wanted this for so long – I’ve even dreamt about it. Please, tell me I can give you everything, and deeply.”
I pant out a hard breath as his thumb finds my clit.
“Yes, yes, goddamnit, ahhh yes, cum in me baby. Cum for me.”
Naughty trick, I ended up begging for it.
I see his jaw tighten as he tenses up against me. He grabs the back of my neck and crushes his lips onto mine. As he cums he moans into my mouth between gasping breaths. I hold him tight into me and slip my tongue against his. His movements slow, I can feel him faintly twitching, and caresses turn tender. We relax and sink into one another, still kissing softly.
“You did not dream about this,” I finally break in.
“I absolutely did. You’ve been inhabiting every corner of my thoughts, are you surprised?”
“Not for the reasons you can imagine.”
“Another time,” I pull his lips back onto mine and feel him gently grinding into me. “Oh?”
“You have no idea how hot that was, telling me to beg you, fuck. I’m still so horny and hard.”
A knock echoes out from the door and we can hear Lucy call “Freaks” and laugh before her footfalls go the other way.
“Not gonna lie, reality fell away and I totally forgot we were even in here,” I admit.
“You know she’s probably just going to get a drink and come right back in without knocking again, that was her warning shot.”
“In true Lucy style.”
We laugh and scramble to get dressed, all the while kissing heavily and stumbling about. Pulling my shirt over my head as the last piece in the clothing puzzle, Jude grabs my face and pushes me back onto the couch, things getting hot and heavy again instantly, when Lucy throws open the door.
“Wait, you haven’t even fucked yet? Jude close the deal!”
“Timeout. Are you telling me you knew we were going to -?” I trail off.
“So full disclosure, been meaning to tell you, by the way, Sara and I have been at it for months. Notice the afterglow?” Lucy turns her face side to side showing off the blush in her cheeks.
As I piece things together in my mind I turn towards Jude with a questioning look.
“Oh, don’t be mad at him, it was my idea. A little white lie in the service of love,” Lucy protests. “He was driving us all absolutely fucking insane over you so Sara and I came up with the idea to just get you two alone. I was joking about you going at it, but uh, this room is mad effectively soundproofed, couldn’t hear you two at all from down there and upon closer inspection, you deeeeeefinitely fucked,” she laughs.
“My best friend, the mastermind. You do know this is entrapment.” I turn back towards Jude, eye brow lifted in a question needing an answer.
“You heard the woman,” he kisses me like Lucy’s not even there, “a little white lie in service of our love.” He pulls his face back to search my face and whispers, “Are you sorry about it?”
It’s obvious he doesn’t feel as nonchalantly flippant about what happened as Lucy does. And no, I’m not sorry one fucking bit.
“Best lie ever told as far as I’m concerned. Lucy, you owe me a drink, though, for your devious, devious ways, so hand it over and turn on something heavy and chill. Then get the fuck out, we’re not done here.”
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